I’m one of those people who finds other people saying to them on a regular basis “I don’t know how you do it all”. I hate it. Mainly because the minute it’s said to me I start mentally recalling all the things that I don’t do and all the ways in which I feel like I’m not being the best I can be. The person saying it I’m sure is mentally curating the list of things that they think they’re failing to deliver while stacking it up against all these things that they assume I’m doing. It’s a lose-lose for both of us.
You see the reality of it all couldn’t be further from the truth. I don’t get it “all” done. I work all.the.time. If I’m not at my day job then I’m working on my blog and the long list of things I need to get done so I can turn my passion into a business and quit the day job. I’m either on the computer writing, on the sewing machine creating or on social media trying to keep the business ticking over. I’m up early in the morning (like crazy stupid early) and I work until I go to sleep.
I juggle our son’s needs in amongst all of this so that I work twice as hard when he’s playing with his Dad or at Kindy so that when he’s home I can devote uninterrupted time to being his Mum and forging memories with him. I’d love to say I do this really well, but I suck at getting the balance right and I find myself saying “Sorry Buddy, Mummy’s working” a lot more than I would like on a daily basis. As for being a housewife, I suck at that. While we don’t live in a house that you’d see in the newspaper as being a house of ill-repute it’s certainly not somewhere I’d recommend eating off the floor any time soon. (Although on some days it looks like someone has been eating off the floor!) In fact, it’s only been in the last month that we’ve acknowledged that the stress of me trying to balance housework on top of everything else isn’t helping and we need to sacrifice something (fabric budget) to get in a regular cleaner. While the cleaner helps me to keep working I still feel like crap when she comes in and sees how much jam is stuck to our dinner table.
That’s basically what my life has been for the past 12 months – I’m so focused on making a business that I’m sliding everywhere else. We haven’t seen our friends on any sort of a regular basis for so long I’m not even sure we’ve still got some of them. If I’m not working I’m trying to be a mother who’s present. My to-do list is never ending and with the addition of the Farmer’s Wife and getting my first book written it’s just ridiculous.
I don’t tell you this because I’m unhappy, I tell you this because I want you to know that everything has a price and while it looks like I’m powering through everything the truth is I’m living moment to moment and in a complete “putting out fires” kind of way. With HUBBY being away all of January it’s just spiralled out of control and I’m back to being really stressed, not sleeping and feeling like crap. But I know myself well enough to know that if I don’t step in and make some changes things will continue to spiral and I’ll do more damage than progress. So today I’m sharing with you that I’m not coping.
But I’m making changes. I want you to know this so that if you’re in the situation where you think you should be doing all this “stuff” and trying to keep up that it’s ok to just say enough is enough and step off the ride when you need to. I remember a boss I had telling me one day when I’d come into work looking like crap (because I’d been working for weeks trying to get a good reputation at work so I could apply for a promotion) that the world would not stop if something happened to me. That I needed to put myself first because no one else would and the work will never end, so it’s no use burning myself out to try and get it all done. Work hard, not crazy. She was right. I got sick (which was inevitable) had a week off and when I came back the work had still gone ahead and nothing had changed. That’s the way of the world; it doesn’t stop spinning.
At times it’s hard for me to remember that lesson until it’s too late, like now. But when I am reminded of it I know that I need to step back and make changes. Stop. Recharge and come back better than before. So that’s what I’ve been doing. I’ve stopped anything that’s not crucial (like building my second blog that I’ve got such big hopes for but can’t seem to make the time to give it the attention it needs in amongst everything else, and it kills me that it’s not going anywhere fast). I’ve spent some time with friends. I’ve asked for help to manage my stress and lack of sleep. I’m following the doctors orders and you know what; I’m feeling better because of it. I’ve also given myself permission to be “late” with things and to just remove others altogether from my to-do list. While it’s sucked to watch good things happening for others that are working hard, I know that it’s only temporary and after a recharge I’ll be back on track and better for it.
So please, if you’re looking at my life and thinking “Man, I wish I could do everything she does” knock it off! I’m just like you, doing one thing a day and considering it a success. Heck, I’m sitting here late afternoon writing this in my PJ’s. The same PJ’s I’ve been wearing for the past two days. Some days it’s just a success to make it through the day without crying. Be kind to yourself. Seriously, you only get one shot at life and you don’t want to look back and think “I burned myself out for something that just went on without me anyways”. Spend time with those that love you, remember why you’re working so hard and be kind to your knees, they’re the only ones you’ll ever get!
On that note, I’m off to watch some crappy television, maybe read a book and get as many hugs from the boys as they’ll give me before getting annoyed at me. I hope you have a calm day and more importantly you’re being kind to yourself!
FUN THINGS TO CLICK ON
- Easter is coming and so the cute little rabbits are coming out to play, I love this Bunny Bag from Jemima at Tied with a Ribbon. Click here for the tutorial.
- Loving this zipper bag from Lori Holt, perfect for stitching on the go. Click here for the tutorial.
- Loving this little fabric basket and eggs tutorial from Amy at Diary of a Quilter which is perfect for the little ones in your world. Click here for the tutorial.
- I need to make myself one of these to save my sunglasses from the ravages of my handbag; Sew Easy Sunglasses Case tutorial at Sew Mama Sew. Click here for the tutorial.
- Do you use starch with your fabrics? Then you might enjoy this article from Cassandra Madge about the virtues and hidden dangers of starch. Click here to read.
- This is a project I have in the wings waiting for some time in the spotlight so I’m totally saving this tutorial from Kitty at Night Quilter for later. Click here to read more.
COMMUNITY CORK BOARD
- The Maldon Combined Quilters in the historic National Trust classified town of Maldon, Victoria, are holding their biannual Quilt Show on 26 & 27 March, 2016 as part of the Maldon Easter Fair. They’re expecting it to be a bumper show with a diverse range of 50+ quilts, including designs such as Mrs Billings, Briar Hill, some beautiful Di Ford patterns, and other hand and machine pieced traditional, reproduction and contemporary works. Click here to find out more.
- Canberra Quilters Inc. are celebrating their 40th Anniversary in 2016 and to mark the occasion they’re holding a “Celebrate 40 Challenge”. It’s open to Australian and New Zealand Residents, with 40 quilts (quilts must be 40cm x 100cm) being selected to hang at the 2016 Annual Member’s Exhibition. (You don’t have to be a member to enter!) It’s a great challenge and you can find out more or enter by clicking here.
Want something included on the Community Cork Board, then why not drop me an email and if it’s applicable to the GnomeAngel community I’ll share it. It can be anything from a local fate, a charity raffle, a class you’re teaching, a pattern you’ve released, a sew-a-long you’re involved in to a community event that’s happening. Be sure to send me as much detail as you can and links to any applicable websites. I do not have any affiliation with the information provide, it is done so as a community service only. Click here to email me.
- Fat Quarter Shop Crossroads Quilt-along to benefit the March of Dimes has started. You can find the free patterns by clicking here. I’m going to be an official blogger for it and so I’ll be sharing my version of the quilt (which I adore) you can find out more by clicking here.
- If you’d like to take a class with me, then why not check out my class list by clicking here or maybe you’d like to work with me to help promote your brand/business/store/product, click here to find out more about partnering with me.
- Make machine quilting fun, relaxing and rewarding. Learn how to machine quilt all your own projects for pucker-free results with beautiful designs. Click here to find out more!
Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you purchase those items through my links I will earn a very small commission. You will not pay more when buying a product through my link, in fact in some cases I can offer you a better price via an affiliate link. I will not recommend something that I do not use myself. These commissions help me keep being able to provide you with great content for free. Thank you, in advance for your support!